SecondIron's Blog

Sharpening Iron to Live Second

An Open Letter to the Dad I never knew

Dear Dad, I am writing this letter, and I hope it finds you in good health.  That probably sounds strange since we have not talked in many years or perhaps ever. Either way, I wish you only the best today which is different from the way it has been. I have tried to write this letter many times before and never succeeded. However, I do have a few things I would like to share with you, things I think you should know. When you walked away and left me behind, you left more than just a child. You left behind a part of you in me that I have had to live with my entire life, up until now. I doubt I cried tears when you left, at least not over your leaving. Perhaps when the hunger and dirty diapers that kicked in, I likely shed some tears, but they were not for you. I would have to have known you to cry for you, or so I thought. Growing up I got used to being called names like a bastard, I mean you did leave so it was somewhat accurate. Then again are you a bastard when both parents leave? Anyway, I digress, where was I? Oh yeah… As a child, it was uncomfortable never really fitting in. Fights were normal as I always felt alone and out-of-place. Anyone that called be a bas”….” or “son of a b….” , well those were fighting words.  I had parents, but they did not look like me. I had anger […]

How Real are Your Social Media Friends?

Last week I posted on social media on my Facebook account that I needed to change the people I hung out with. I was not pointing fingers or making accusations, yet some got very defensive. I received comments and direct messages of concern and anxiety. People wondering if they had done something or if I was okay. Granted it was nice to see the people who genuinely cared for my well-being.  Even more, it was interesting to see those that didn’t bother to comment either way. I am not judging a fleeting moment on social media to gauge my friendships, neither should you. Friends on social media are usually taken at face value, for we don’t have much else to go on. However they many times will behave more like your friends than your real ones. What is your ROI of your social media friends? #socialmedia Click To Tweet This little exercise accomplished a few things for me. What was merely a simple statement of fact of where my head and heart was at, also perhaps provided some insight into relationships and social media? Social Media is Surface Level – We get so wrapped up in the statuses, feeds and 140 character snippets of people’s’ lives we forget to create relationships with the people. Glued to our smartphones, we would likely not even recognize the person outside of the avatar small square, much less in real life. People are easily offended – Ever type an email or text message that was taken out of context? […]

Re-entry is Hard, Yet Worth Every Moment

A little over a week ago I was asked about how I handle re-entry after a mission trip. I just returned from my latest mission, and I think I have an answer. Re-entry is hard; I am not going to lie. I think almost anyone that has gone to serve in another country and allowed their hearts to be broken would agree. It is not hard because of what you left behind in the country you helped, so much as what you are reintroduced to at home. For me, it is the self-absorbed, technology driven, ‘all-about-me’ mentality that hurts upon re-entry. We are called to serve to help others as well as ourselves. Click To Tweet When you spend time loving on people that simply want to be loved. People that accept you for who you are. Who welcome you with open arms like family. It is leaving them and coming back to the ‘real world’ that is hard. I think God chooses people to go on mission trips for varied reasons. Everyone is different on the way they are impacted. If you allow the scales to fall from your eyes to see what God has in store for you. It is when you allow Him to soften your heart that you too will be forever changed and find re-entry just as hard. Here are some ways I have found that help me cope with re-entry. Understanding that they don’t understand – As soon as you get home, you will get bombarded with questions from […]